On Being Held

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When our daughter was an infant, she had terrible colic. Our pediatrician assured us she would outgrow it and in the meantime all we could really do was hold her. Night after night I’d walk the floor, holding my precious little baby in my arms as she wailed in pain. One night I noticed her tiny hands clenching the fabric of my shirt as though if she let go she would surely fall. I remember thinking, “Oh my child, my arms are wrapped around you. You’re not going anywhere. Relax, little one. I’m not letting go of you.” I couldn’t explain to her why she hurt. Oh, I could have spoken the words, but she would never have been able to comprehend the explanation. All I could do was hold on to her in the midst of her pain.

Throughout my journey of grief, my heavenly Father has had His arms wrapped around me, holding tightly through the long nights of my wailing and pain. But had He chosen to give me an explanation for His allowing our suffering, I would no more have been able to understand it than my infant daughter would have understood my explanation of colic. God’s ways are not my ways. His thoughts are not my thoughts. He is God.

Recently, Casting Crowns released a wonderful new song, Just Be Held. Listen. And allow our Heavenly Father to hold you close today.

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